Ocelot does a Prank Call
by Punished 'Dread' Angel
Summary: When Ocelot is unable to sleep, he decides to do a little prank call on one of his comrades.


Mother Base was quiet. Too quiet. Not even the sound of tapes that Quiet herself would play couldn't be heard across the Medical Platform. A single lone soul wandered about the Command Platform, casually twirling a gun around his finger. The Diamond Dogs commander known as Revolver Ocelot stepped out into a light, frowning as he looked over the sea. Despite it being the middle of the night, the commander just was not able to sleep, no matter how hard he tried. He sighed, turned on his heel and walked back to where he came from. He pushed a door open and walked to his quarters, sitting on the bed.

"Ah, darnit..." He frowned, a hand on his forehead. Just as he said that, something on a nearby table caught his attention. His phone. Ocelot stood up, walking over to the table and picking up his phone. He looked around to check if anyone was watching him, then an evil little plot hatched in his brain. He jabbed in Miller's number, eagerly waiting for him to pick up. Eventually, he heard the sound.

"What?" The commander growled.

"I have just one question for you." Ocelot said casually into the phone, though altered the sound of his voice slightly.

"Question?" Miller grumbled.

"Are you ready?" Ocelot smirked, finding it increasingly difficult to not get close to laughter.

"Ready...for what?"

"ARE YOU READY FOR THIS SUNDAY NIGHT WHEN DIAMOND DOGS LEADER BIG BOSS DEFENDS HIS TITLE AT THE MOTHER BASE SSSUUUPPPERRR SSSLLLAAAMMM!?" The sudden yelling caused Miller's phone to fall out of his grip, flipping around in the air as he tried to catch it with his one hand.

"What!? Ocelot, is that you!?" Miller shouted back "I swear to god, if it is, then this is going straight to the Boss!"

"Right now you can order this awesome pay-per-view event for only 59.99!" Ocelot lowered the volume of his yelling slightly, as he heard a few people get up and leave their quarters briefly.

"Look, Ocelot, if that is you, then cut it out. I'm trying to sleep!" Miller immediatly hung up, though Ocelot immediatly rang again. Miller picked it up "What!?"

"And goodbye to ANYONE standing in Big Boss' way when he takes on SIX Men in a steel cage chutes and ladders match at Mother Base SSSSUUUPPERRR SLLLAAAMM!"

Miller immediatly hung up, Ocelot dropping the phone and having to rest his head on his hand as he leaned on the table in absoloute hysterics. After taking his time to calm down, he grabbed the phone again, though a gloved hand gripped his wrist immediatly. Ocelot flinched from the sudden force, following the arm that the hand was connected to, eventually winding up making eye contact with Venom Snake "Oh, uh, hey Boss."

"I heard that, you know?" Venom frowned. Ocelot gulped. Venom was actually rather harsh when it came to punishments and the men of Diamond Dogs always feared the moment that they would be beaten to a bloody pulp if they messed up one time. Ocelot was surprised to see Venom crack a smile, however and chuckling "Let me handle this." He took the phone, calling Miller once again. A minute or two of ringing passed, Miller eventually picking up.

"I swear to god..." He snarled.

"I'm watching you." Venom said firmly.

"Boss!" Miller quickly gathered himself "Someone was just-"

"That's exactly what Skull Face told Big Boss at the last Wrestlemania! But will he be able to take the belt from the mightiest soldier in history at this weekend's Mother Base SSSSUUUPPPERRR SSLLLAAAMMM!?" Venom yelled, Miller immediatly burying his face in his hand upon hearing it. He picked the phone back up, scowling again.

"I'm going back to sleep." He stated firmly, hanging up and slamming the phone on his bedside table.

Venom handed Ocelot his phone back, the two exchanging a glance for a while before bursting into laughter, Ocelot having to use the table once more to support himself. A few minutes passed before the men managed to recollect themselves "Alright Ocelot, we've had our fun. Goodnight." Venom turned to the exit of the room, still smiling.

"G'night, sir." Ocelot nodded. Once Venom had left, he threw his jacket onto a hangar, slowly setting himself down on his bed, finally able to get himself to sleep.

 **I am so sorry.**


End file.
